Sink or Swim

I know we all have a story that made you question your entire being. One that changed your life taking you in a different direction than you thought out. There are these moments that occur in our lives that you choose the route you want to take. And I have found ultimately that moment comes to the decision to sink or swim. You see...I was that woman who stared demons in the eyes more times than I would like to count. The woman who questioned her entire being to not only herself but those around me who needed me dearly. These moments take on different forms of how they appear in your life.

The ocean was always my greatest challenge. My biggest fear, yet my most freeing place. There is something powerful about the moment you stand before the ocean. The comparison the sea plays to our lives. You stand before the sea and realize how large it is around you. The waves crashing and the chaos within the waves. How small you seem to an entire world of unknown. The decision to enter a world of unknown and let it consume you. I stood before the sea and dropped to my knees. Yes I wanted to be free but to what degree. The waves crashing on the shore. Each crash seeming to become louder than the one before. Sink or swim…I asked myself again, do you want to sink or swim?

Within the chaos of the waves I found peace. A moment of silence, found within my breath. My breath... yes there was chaos but I was still alive. Despite the heartbreak, the pain, the betrayal. I was still here…breathing on my own. The power of that moment in itself changed my life. I realized my chance at freedom is not only in allowing myself to sink or stopping the chaos around me. The freedom was in the power to choose to swim. The freedom was in the power of each breath that I took. The freedom was having the power to find my voice. The power of that moment led to me finally rediscovering me.